Festive Traditions - Part 2, The Present

This is part two of a two-part set, please see https://everythingallison.wixsite.com/everything-allison/post/festive-traditions-part-1-the-past for part 1.

In the first part of this 'duology' of sorts, I discussed how the traditions I had taken for granted were altered and changed with my mum's death. In the aftermath of her death, I found a new kind of family family, and with them, new traditions. One pretty big difference between my Christmases now and then is where I spend them. I have stayed in Sheffield for Christmas each year since my mum died and that bought both challenges and new joys. Someone once promised me that I would never be alone at Christmas as long as I was in Sheffield. Either you get adopted into other people's Christmases, or you adopt them.

Friendsmas

This year, I hosted a 'friendsmas' meal on 9th December. Each person who came brought a dish, while I cooked the turkey. It was a really lovely, busy little event. I took lots of photos and had a surprisingly pain-free cleanup. I hope that it becomes something I am able to do every year.

The Rocky Horror Picture Show

Another new tradition is that a group of my friends go to watch the immersive viewing of The Rocky Horror Picture Show at the SU. Even though several of these friends have adult jobs in different parts of the country, we all congregate yearly for this.

Before this year, Rocky Horror was in November or December. This year marks a change, it has been moved to June. Despite this, I wanted to include it in my Christmas traditions post because there is something inherently festive about it in my brain.

New Year's Eve

The final 'big' thing I've started doing since my mum died is having New Year's Eve plans. In 2021, I spent New Year's Eve at her funeral. I chose to travel there and back in one day, an exhausting feat at the best of times, nevermind with rail strikes and a reduced timetable due to New Year's Eve. I read a poem at her funeral, held myself together for my siblings until it was time for me to go home to Sheffield. Then, I got back to Sheffield and walked back through the New Year's revelry to an empty house (through various circumstances the house was empty that day).

I decided that night that I never wanted to spend New Year's Eve on my own again. So, I've hosted a party in the two years that followed. Last year, I had about 10 friends round over the course of the evening and this year I'm hoping for similar numbers. Many of my friends go home for the Christmas break, but there are always a dependable group who remain in Sheffield, or are always up for a traipse back up.

Continuing Traditions

Just because I spend the holiday season very differently now, it doesn't mean that all the traditions I once participated in are gone. I still watch Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire each Christmas. I still read a whole book on Christmas day. I still decorate a tree, sing Christmas songs, and cook for those I love.

Even though the person I shared much of this with is gone, it doesn't mean my life stopped. I have lived two years without my mum. By the time I am my oldest sister's age, I will have lived more than half of my life without her.

I find myself thinking more and more about my younger self. I think she'd be proud of where I am now and what I am doing. I intend to keep building new traditions as I get older, and to keep sharing them with my friends and the people who held me together through this transitory period of my life.